Saturday, January 14, 2017

Extrovert ego vs the introverted heart

I've always welcomed the moments to be truly introspective and self reflecting. Self effacement is a big portion of my personality, and I enjoy discovering new (sometimes awful) things about myself. I like to fall on my sword. I like to deeply dissect my fault lines, and speak on these things with kind and understanding people.

I've been lucky to have contrasting qualities to my personality and mindset. And although hard for some to read and understand, I find that I'm not alone in this advantage/curse.

So I'm going to try to navigate it, as best as I can hungover. Cause, well....booze.

10 things you gotta know about the introverted extrovert girl. We exist. Just like mermaid and unicorns.

1- She doesn't need you for much, but wants you for everything. Having an extroverted personality and mindset comes with a certain confidence and independence. She doesn't need you to do anything or be anything for her. She can create all she needs with her own hands and mind- except love. It may be the only thing she needs you for, and with an introverted heart, you have to show up.

2- She will challenge you. Not in an aggressive way, but she spends real time questioning herself.  And she likes the idea or out growing herself at every turn. Cause to evolve is to live. She desires a partner who can grit their tit in the face of chance and challenge, and pull through to the other side.

3- She knows what it means to be alone, and she likes it. She is content with herself. Not because she has all she wants or needs, but because she is forgiving of her human condition and appreciative of all moments, even the small ones.

4- she cares what you think. As a strong extrovert, others opinions don't matter much on the surface. With an introverted heart, those she lets close to her, their opinions weigh heavy.

5- she is unapologetically herself. Often displayed as bitchy or narcissistic, which couldn't be further from the truth. A dueling personality like this is a hard one to maneuver. You straddle this fine line, where one part of you couldn't care less, while the other is deeply empathetic to not let their tongue (mind) overstep their heart.

6- she is loyal. A girl with an emo heart and a forward thinking mind will find opportunity for pure bliss and stay loyal to it. They can believe in impossible things, and even believe they can achieve them, and work hard to making that hypothesis into a theory, and finally a fact.

7- they're vulnerable, if you made it this far. Once you break the shell of societal standard and parameters, they're very exposed. Like a lifetime of secrets just held right past their lips. And unveiling themselves in such a way creates an intense bond for them.

8- they're sensitive. Above anything else I've stated, they're incredible sensitive. They can feel a tilt, a change; and will often speak on it from their inherent confidence. They can also feel a deep connection much earlier than others and nurture it to full growth.

9- they're mostly misunderstood. Misunderstood by peers, friends, lovers and even themselves. Unless you have a deeply connected bond with them, they will assume you don't have a clue on how they feel or operate.

10 - they understand the importance of a true connection. For all the contrasting traits, and confusion , and overthinking- they know the beauty, simplicity, and rarity of a true connection. Everything is fleeting- but to understand the importance in the presence of something gold- that's uncommon in this digital age.

To love an introverted extrovert isn't easy, to be honest, I don't know if I personally could love someone like myself. I know what it means to be one, and I know it's an extremely passionate and thoughtful love.  And someone great told me that sometimes, the best things in love are the ones that test your limits, push you in a way you couldn't push yourself.

Maybe it's not so bad.


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