Only while covered in vomit.

So yesterday was awful. My youngest woke up from a nap burning up, proceeded to vomit all over  me, and then had a febrile seizure. And of course I was a train wreck calling for an ambulance. And in the ambulance. And at the hospital. Just a hot mess all over. She ended up being just fine and is back to plotting the worlds takeover right after Sesame Street. Bless her little heart. 

As I sat and thought late last night, going over everything that had happened, and doing the mom wind down, what I uncovered was right on par for my life. 

I could look put together and adorable and run into LITERALLY no one I would be attracted to or want. Like spending the whole day with the cast from the Hills have Eyes. 

Yesterday. YESTERDAY! Although I changed my shirt out before running into the ambulance I still had that aromatic smell of curdled milk and self loathing. The police officer- hot. The doctor- hot. Both sweet but when they got within 3 feet of me that twinkle in their eye vanished- with a quickness!  Hilarious. 

And so it goes- Universe -2. Me -0.